"The wheel keeps turning"

[denny]

"I kept everything inside and even though I tried, it all fell apart.
What it meant to me will eventually be a memory of a time when I tried so hard ..." -- Linkin Park, In The End

I'm feeling quite a bit better today. I think my head broke so badly yesterday that the only way I could go was up. I'm still very sad, but it seems more controllable now. Mornings are still the most difficult bit... they meant a lot, and now there's a gap in them.

Last night I failed to hit a fairly important and easily achievable deadline at work, even after it had been extended twice (originally it was last Thursday). This has, unsurprisingly, failed to impress my boss. I'm a bit worried after the talk we had a few weeks ago... I can only hope that he can see the difference between me not putting enough effort in, and me trying really hard but failing. And that he cares about the difference.

I'm not really sure what's happening about my birthday... I had tentative plans for it to be really quite fantastic, but now it seems quite likely that they're not going to happen. I was also planning a bit of a party, which also won't happen as Helen is moving house that weekend. I may have to compensate for this problem by having a monster moving-in party when I get the new flat, although that's a way off. Still, maybe I'll be in a better mood for it by then... things keep changing so fast at the minute, at least some of them have got to change for the better again soon, right?

Comments

[kaz-pixie.livejournal.com]

*squish*

Give me a shout if you need cheering up one lunchtime and I'll bring my funny hat and a pair of oversized sunglasses - I'm planning to have something going on with games/BBQ/people/DVDs on either sunday or Monday, and again on 15th I'll be having a house party so if you fancy all or any of those give me a shout :)