Today/Nathan
Dec. 1st, 2003 06:45 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dennySo today is World AIDS Day. Today I'm remembering my friend Nathan.
Nathan introduced me to horror movies (Return of the Living Dead at 8 - good job I didn't spook too easily).
Nathan once spent an entire game of Monopoly against me with his hand up his girlfriend's skirt. I lost, badly. It was quite distracting. So maybe he introduced me to voyeurism, at the age of about 12 :)
Nathan's family were such useless twats that he practically lived at my house, and he called my mother 'Mum' until the day he died.
Nathan came out when he was about 18 (I was about 15 at this point, I think), and he left the disapproving family home to go and live in Brighton, where he became a stripper in a variety of gay nightclubs.
Nathan probably shagged around a bit, but in particular, he shagged the manager of one of those clubs. A man who already knew he had full-blown AIDS, but chose to have unprotected sex with young guys who he didn't share this bit of information with. He'd decided he didn't want to go out alone, it seems. And so Nathan became HIV+.
Nathan got into a long-term monogamous relationship not long before he found this out. Fortunately, he hadn't infected his partner. Unfortunately, they didn't get to have that long a time together.
Nathan never did develop full-blown AIDS - he died in a motorcycle accident. On a straight dry stretch of road, with no witnesses, him and his bike were found wrapped around a lamppost. Maybe he rode a bit too hard and fast - 'carpe diem' and all that. Maybe someone cut him up and drove off from the scene of the crash. We'll never know.
Nathan had given some thought to his funeral. No-one was allowed to wear black, unless it was leather or rubber :) Which meant I was the only one in black, having ridden to Brighton on a 250 Superdream to attend, in my bike leathers. His boyfriend asked me to lead the funeral procession, because I was on the bike, and he thought Nathan would have liked that. At the service, they played Dancing Queen. The song makes me think of him whenever I hear it now, but in a good way.
I'm not religious. I don't believe Nathan is now somewhere else - not in 'a better place', and not somewhere being punished for his lifestyle either. He's gone. But I do believe he made the most of his life while he had it, which eases the pain when I think of how little time he had.
Nathan introduced me to horror movies (Return of the Living Dead at 8 - good job I didn't spook too easily).
Nathan once spent an entire game of Monopoly against me with his hand up his girlfriend's skirt. I lost, badly. It was quite distracting. So maybe he introduced me to voyeurism, at the age of about 12 :)
Nathan's family were such useless twats that he practically lived at my house, and he called my mother 'Mum' until the day he died.
Nathan came out when he was about 18 (I was about 15 at this point, I think), and he left the disapproving family home to go and live in Brighton, where he became a stripper in a variety of gay nightclubs.
Nathan probably shagged around a bit, but in particular, he shagged the manager of one of those clubs. A man who already knew he had full-blown AIDS, but chose to have unprotected sex with young guys who he didn't share this bit of information with. He'd decided he didn't want to go out alone, it seems. And so Nathan became HIV+.
Nathan got into a long-term monogamous relationship not long before he found this out. Fortunately, he hadn't infected his partner. Unfortunately, they didn't get to have that long a time together.
Nathan never did develop full-blown AIDS - he died in a motorcycle accident. On a straight dry stretch of road, with no witnesses, him and his bike were found wrapped around a lamppost. Maybe he rode a bit too hard and fast - 'carpe diem' and all that. Maybe someone cut him up and drove off from the scene of the crash. We'll never know.
Nathan had given some thought to his funeral. No-one was allowed to wear black, unless it was leather or rubber :) Which meant I was the only one in black, having ridden to Brighton on a 250 Superdream to attend, in my bike leathers. His boyfriend asked me to lead the funeral procession, because I was on the bike, and he thought Nathan would have liked that. At the service, they played Dancing Queen. The song makes me think of him whenever I hear it now, but in a good way.
I'm not religious. I don't believe Nathan is now somewhere else - not in 'a better place', and not somewhere being punished for his lifestyle either. He's gone. But I do believe he made the most of his life while he had it, which eases the pain when I think of how little time he had.
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(no subject)
Date: 2003-12-01 11:50 am (UTC)It sounds like Nathan lived his as he wanted it, and that's good :) In a way, it was probably kinder for him to die in the way he did, rather than in the agony of AIDS.
I duno, it's kinda weird typing this coz i dont know you at all, but you left the entry open to comments and I found when James died, very few people commented. So i thought i would just to let u know i was thinking of you and know how you feel.
(no subject)
Date: 2003-12-01 03:26 pm (UTC)Anyway, thankyou for your comment.
(no subject)
Date: 2003-12-02 09:34 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2003-12-01 12:01 pm (UTC)As things stand I don't have anyone I've known to remember especially on this day. But you're not the only one that's done something like this in their journal today.
Not much more than an "I read this" comment, but I needed to leave it.
E.
x
(no subject)
Date: 2003-12-01 03:28 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2003-12-01 01:32 pm (UTC)I have a feeling he is very happy and proud of how you remember him
*hugs*
(no subject)
Date: 2003-12-02 07:19 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2003-12-02 01:09 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2003-12-02 07:20 am (UTC)Thanks.
(no subject)
Date: 2003-12-02 02:58 am (UTC)I do hope that some day there will be a cure for AIDS, but in the meantime people should work on that acceptance thing. I moved away from home because it was populated with idiots who believe AIDS is God's punishment against homosexuals. I can't stand such closed-mindedness and idiocy... but I know these are things that can never be cured... :(
(no subject)
Date: 2003-12-02 07:18 am (UTC)