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dennySuddenly find myself very definitely depressed. Miserable, without the air of excitement that might include, and with no belief or even interest in the concept of things getting better at some point.
This shouldn't come as a massive surprise to me - my first proper dip into depression a couple of years back, while fuelled by many things, was almost certainly started or greatly accentuated by losing my job. My sense of self-worth seems to suffer greatly from not being considered 'employable' by the world at large. Perhaps this is why I never tried harder to succeed at being self-employed, despite that being the obvious answer to many of the problems I have with the typical workplace environment.
I'm not entirely sure why I'm posting this... I was going to ask people who see me to keep an eye out for me slipping into depression, but as soon as I started typing I realised I'm already here. So... I don't know what next. People who see me, please be aware that I may not respond to things in a normal manner, I suppose. It's nothing personal.
This shouldn't come as a massive surprise to me - my first proper dip into depression a couple of years back, while fuelled by many things, was almost certainly started or greatly accentuated by losing my job. My sense of self-worth seems to suffer greatly from not being considered 'employable' by the world at large. Perhaps this is why I never tried harder to succeed at being self-employed, despite that being the obvious answer to many of the problems I have with the typical workplace environment.
I'm not entirely sure why I'm posting this... I was going to ask people who see me to keep an eye out for me slipping into depression, but as soon as I started typing I realised I'm already here. So... I don't know what next. People who see me, please be aware that I may not respond to things in a normal manner, I suppose. It's nothing personal.
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(no subject)
Date: 2003-10-06 04:30 am (UTC)you need to get to the doctor, the sooner the better.
Sounds like your employers are being arseholes, it's not a reflection on you at all. You are wonderful and lovely! and next week I shall take you to Oxford to cheer you up.